Best & Worst Pick Up Lines

Best & Worst Pick Up Lines

Andrew wrote on 2008 February, 22

If you’re still stuck in 1978 and using pick up lines, then this one’s for you. For everyone else, have a few laughs on us. Here in no particular order are some of the best & worst. Use at your own risk.

The Best:

On a 1 to 10 scale, I’d say you’re a 1…#1.

Do you work for UPS cause you’re a total package.

Now what’s a nice looking girl like you not doing in a place like my bed?

I have to admit: I’m a Bush supporter. So why don’t you come back to my place so I can support your bush?

Stay there, I’m calling the cops…cause you just stole my heart.

You’re so hot, you’d even give Richard Simmons a hard on.

I’m new to the area. How do I get to your place?

Am I good looking enough to sleep with…or do you need another beer?

Boxers or bare ass?

You know the difference between a real orgasm and a fake one? Let’s find out.

Excuse me, do you know any women here who’d want to date someone who just inherited $50 million dollars?

They say you should never sleep with someone on the first date. Let’s skip to the second date.

There’s no “I” in team. But there is an “I” in intercourse. And that’s exactly what “U” and “I” should have tonight.

I don’t use pick up lines…so your place or mine???

How about we make like iTunes…I’ll download while we make beautiful music together?


The Worst:

Do you come here often? How about I come ‘here’ often (point to the woman’s genital area)

Let’s pretend we’re not married and have sex.

If I ask for your number, do you promise not to charge $3.99 for the first minute, $1.99 each additional minute?

Here’s my favorite equation: add the bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and multiply. Let’s go back to my place and do the math.

If I do you tonight, will you still do me in the morning?

My dick just died. Mind if I give it a proper burial inside you?

You’ll have to forgive me. I’m dyslexic. So let’s fuck first and then talk.

I’m sure you wouldn’t give a blow job to a stranger, so allow me to introduce myself…

Why don’t you sit in my lap and we’ll talk about the first thing that comes up?

Fuck me if I’m wrong, but don’t you have a penis?

Hi I’m Nasty. Let’s go back to my place so you can do the nasty.

I’m between jobs right now…just got hand job and I’m looking for a blow job…do you have any openings?

The average human has 206 bones in their body. How’d you like one more?

Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again?

I hope you’re just as comfortable out of a pair of jeans as you are out of a cocktail dress.


WARNING: The use of these pick up lines could result in a slap across the face. However, if you’re a masochist, that’s actually good news for you.

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